International Women’s Day is all about celebrating our womanhood and our wonderful qualities, the progress we have made so far and our achievements.
It is great to celebrate a day that makes us feel great about ourselves, but do we really? We read all those wonderful articles, listen to motivational speeches and participate in women day celebrations. Does that really make you feel great? I myself have participated in these celebrations and then next day remember myself saying back to the grind! Back to the same old life!
There are many things we can do to make us feel great but the big one that comes to my mind is being unapologetic. When I say that I am looking at different things we end up doing or saying or feeling bad and apologise because we are women. From many wonderful gifts women have received there is one gift we really could have done away is, the gift of the guilt.
Consider this. John is in the pub celebrating a Friday evening with his friends and enjoying himself to the hilt. Shannon his wife calls him and lets him know their son Harry is feeling sick and is vomiting. John pacifies Shannon and tell her to calm down and give him medication and call him if things get worse. He continues with his evening and calls her back only on his way home to check on Harry. He comes home , checks on Harry and then sits down to watch his favourite TV show and tells Shannon, “I told you he will be fine”.
Now replace John with Shannon in same situation. What would be her reactions? She may continue like John did enquiring about her son but she will make calls to check on him, she might lose interest in the evening and may head off home thinking she is the mother so she needs to be home with her son. She feels guilty celebrating a Friday evening while her son is feeling sick. After all parenting is primarily a woman’s job.
Her worry about her son is perfectly legit but why the guilt, which we didn’t see in John in same situation. He assumes since Shannon is there Harry will be fine!
This is just one situation but there are many other situations where women end up feeling guilty. Women feel guilty for focussing on their career, having long working hours, not having a career, travelling, eating heartily, not looking a certain way, not having the perfectly running house or kids not turning out to be super champions.
Somewhere in the pursuit of catching up with men and trying to have it all, we have taken too much on our plate. We do so many things that men can do but we haven’t really mastered their art of not feeling responsible for anything and everything that happens.
Women need to start looking at thing less passionately for their on emotional well being. Always remember when you think “what will happen to my kids, my family ,my work if I am not there?” The answer is “ the show will go on! They will be fine! They will find a way to survive! They will find a replacement at work” It is a harsh reality. You need to know this even if it doesn’t make you feel good and important.
You are trying your best and most of the time things will be ok! So ladies take responsibility but get rid of the guilt.
Happy International Women’s Day